Searching for the melody,
The one I remember from my earliest years,
The one composed for my part in the choir
Taught to me before I could speak.
In order to harmonize with it
I must first hear it, recall it, tune into it.
There is a melody with my name on it
No better nor worse than yours, just mine.
We are all better off when I find the right notes,
If all these years have taught me anything it is that
it is much better to stop singing and listen for the tune
Rather than continue off key.
These days are about listening, not dropping out.
Looking for just the right pitch before re-joining the choir.
Could it be that I am no longer an alto?
Perhaps a tenor, or second soprano?
Voices change over time.
When today I sing in the privacy of my own mind
I hear a different tonality,
My voice has taken on a slightly different color, texture.
My song, though familiar, has a few added notes,
Some higher, some lower,
My range has altered.
Until I can master it
There is no choice but to feel
Tentative.
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