Sunday, February 2, 2014

It's me

You wake up one morning and nothing is the same.
You know nothing can stay the same.
The time has come.

In days past I'd look around trying to decide
Who or what needed changing.
Those days are long gone.
It's me.

A new hairdo won't do it,
Nor a new wardrobe,
Nor a trip or vacation.
Probably don't even need to read a new book, or
Find a new teacher.
Just accept that it's me.

Something is rearranging within,
Beyond my sight, in the background, and
I am unsettled, disturbed, lost.
I feel it shifting, whatever "it" is,
I so want to orchestrate this.

To those watching
It looks like anger perhaps, or
Depression or lethargy or even self-loathing.
More likely it is my awkward attempts at
Remaining present, not flinching,
Eschewing distractions.
Hard work.

3 comments:

  1. Wow, this is really thought provoking. I'll keep it posted so I can comtemplate these words each day. SRG

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hmm...I thought I helped you solve this dilemma in 310 Blanton a lifetime ago. Clearly we have forgotten each other's sage advice.
    I totally get it.
    Is there such a thing as a late life crisis?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You certainly took me a long way on the journey, Sheila Rae. My understanding is that the process of being rearranged from within never ends. That's my hope, anyway.

      Delete

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